(Photo: Michael Kroul @unsplash.com)
A first-person version of Mark 9:14-24…
"I will never forget the day when I began to understand what 'all' really means. Over the years, I had come to trust God for some things, a lot of things, in fact—and He was faithful to me over and over again. But there were just some things, I don’t know, I just had a hard time believing for even though I wanted to believe with all my heart. It was my boy. I loved him so and he was a mess, tormented by who knows what ever since he was little. Nobody could help him. Whatever it was, it seemed to make him worse as he grew older and I was desperately afraid I was going to lose him soon unless there was a miracle. So I brought him to the one I had heard had done many amazing things and who claimed to be the Son of God. When I arrived, though, He was still up on a mountain with a couple of his disciples so I brought my boy to others who were with him—but they couldn’t do a thing, either. My heart sank and I was ready to go home, hopeless.
And then the Son of God showed up and wanted to know what the fuss was all about. When I tried to explain, He seemed to be very frustrated with the whole bunch of us—even His own disciples—for our lack of faith. Well, maybe some of the others were faithless, but I still had some. I was here, wasn’t I? I just didn’t have 'all.' And then in compassion, the Son of God called me and my boy to come near, and whatever it was that was tormenting my son suddenly reacted in the worst way yet when we were standing with Jesus. I began to panic and my heart felt like it was beating out of my chest in fear, and all the while I wanted to scream, 'don’t just stand there, do something!' And instead, He asked a question that I figured that God and the Son of God would already know: 'How long has this been happening?' What?! I realized afterwards, though, that the Son of God was not looking for information—He was looking into my heart and my feeble of walk of faith to strengthen me, and heal my boy.
And when I explained what had been happening (even though I now know He already knew), I pleaded with what little faith and hope I had left within me: 'Have mercy on us and help us, if you can.' And He said...
'What do you mean, ‘If I can’?’ Anything is possible if a person believes.'
He was speaking these amazing words and I was watching my boy in horrible pain and so I blurted out loudly: 'I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!' And it was the God-honest truth of how I felt at the moment. And it’s still the God-honest truth of how I can still feel from time to time when the pressure of life closes in. I think that’s what the Son of God was after—the God-honest truth of what was in my heart so He could strengthen it. But praise God, praise God, praise God, He proved to me He can do all things—He touched my boy and he became a normal kid again with no more suffering, no more tormenting, no more whatever it was that was making his life miserable!
Many years later, I still have those days when I think, 'I do believe, but help me overcome my unbelief!' But the longer I walk with the Jesus, who I now know and believe is truly the Son of God, those days are fewer and fewer as I get to know Him more and more and as I remember to lean hard into what I’ve experienced over and over again is true: all things are indeed possible with God. Great is His faithfulness! And on those days when I forget that, when my faith gets strained or weary, or for when I’m facing another situation that makes my heart feel like it’s pounding out of my chest, I wrote down some words that I’m tucking away for frequent reference:
You are not “the Big Guy”
You are not “the Man upstairs”
You are not just a “higher power”
You are not just a lord to be respected but
Lord of Lords—You are the plural of ALL majesty!
You alone are ALL power, ALL authority
You alone are ALL-sovereign
You alone are maker of ALL heaven and earth
You alone are master and ruler over ALL-everything
And You alone own everything—and because I believe in You, that means I belong to You, too
I can cast ALL my cares upon You—ALL of them
The whole world—my whole world—even today, is in Your hands
And You love ALL that is Yours (even me at my worst)
And You care for ALL that is Yours
And You alone are my only ALL-in-ALL protector, and provider, and Savior, and oh so much more
You never change—from everlasting to everlasting, You are Adonai!
Lord of Lords—a plural of ALL majesty!
You are…worthy of ALL my praise, ALL my worship, ALL my life, for ALL of my days."
“The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For in Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.”
—Colossians 1:15-17, NIV
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