Deeper Still

Photo credit: Lucas Allman

“I know there is no turning back

Once my feet have left the ledge

And in the rush I hear a voice

That's telling me to take a leap of faith

So here I go

I'm diving in, I'm going deep, in over my head I want to be

Caught in the rush, lost in the flow, in over my head I want to go…”

—The Dive, Steven Curtis Chapman

I had never felt so paralyzed with fear of the unknown. I was at the edge of the deep end of the town pool, staring toward the ladder at the 4' section some 25 yards away. It might as well have been 25 miles. So long as I could touch bottom and have some control, hey, I was fine. But at 8 years old, the right-of-passage from beginner to intermediate (and remaining cool with your friends) meant diving into water wayyyyyy over your head and swimming to that ladder.

"I cannot do this....I have got to do this." Waffle, waffle, waffle.

I must have stood at the edge...ready to jump, afraid to jump, ready...for at least 15 minutes. It felt like forever. And I might still be there had it not been for my swim instructor. He did not ridicule, he did not yell. Quietly, over and over, he said:

"C'mon, you can do this—I'm right here."

And he waited, and waited, and waited without once getting impatient. Suddenly...I don't know what sent me over the edge, but the next thing I knew, I was mid-air between the cement deck and the icy, scary, deep water. Out of control, but oddly, totally at peace. The most shocking thing was not the ice-cold temperature of the water when I landed, but that I realized I was not sinking but going forward, one arm stroke and leg kick at a time. And when I arrived at that ladder, I laughed like a cool 8-year-old is supposed to: "That was awesome!" My swim instructor just nodded and smiled...

On this faith journey, it's funny how at the start of every new day you can keep running into that kid: Will I dive in to the glorious unknown and heed the call once more to “follow Me” or play it safe and stand at the edge? The kid is seen in decisions to be made during the day, the temptation to compromise in some way, the attitudes without words but that speak volumes as well as the words that come out of your mouth, the opportunities to be generous with kindness to others and in spending of free moments and money.

The flesh almost always prefers the safety and comfort of the edge of the pool where it is easy to touch and understand (and control) rather than to boldly dive deeper still into the depths of trust-and-obey-for-there's-no-other-way. Which might be one big reason why we are exhorted to "fight the good fight of faith" every single day.

And this week, some reinforcing words from a good book...

…“Most of us will only follow Christ to the point of precedence—the place where we have been before. But no further. We’re afraid of doing what we’ve never done because it’s unfamiliar territory. So we leave unclaimed the new gifts, new anointing, and new dreams that God wants to give us. If you want God to do something new, you cannot keep doing what you’ve always done. You’ve got to push past the fear of the unknown. You’ve got to do something different.
We need to step into the conflict without knowing if we can resolve it.
We need to share our faith without knowing how our friends will react to it.
We need to pray for a miracle without knowing how God will answer.
We need to put ourselves in a situation that activates a spiritual gift we’ve never exercised before.
And we need to go after a dream that is destined to fail without Divine intervention.
We want a money-back guarantee before we take a step of obedience, but that eliminates faith from the equation. Sometimes, we need to take a flying leap of faith.” 

—Mark Batterson, from “All In"

It matters not whether you are young or old, or how many miles you've walked on the Journey. The kid on the edge of the pool is relentless. What matters is getting into the daily habit of heeding the encouraging voice of the greatest Guide of all: "C'mon, you can do this—I'm right here," because:

“I have come in order that you might have life—life in all its fullness.”—John 10:10, Good News Translation